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Thursday, August 17, 2023

But First These Messages: Back to School

But First these Messages 




             August... Or September uh back to school.  Back to school ads seem to show up around July baffling some people. A lot of schools return in August so I guess it makes sense. When I was a kid, school usually started the last week of August.   That also seems to give something for the retail stores to do between the lulls of not having any holidays to content with and getting ready for Christmas. 

        This post is also a kind of revival of our  But First These Messages posts since they are kind of a different animal to the other kinds of posts I do here.  It's hard to link back to older posts since they are also Youtube heavy and when a video/channel is gone that video gone it's a mess.  I'm trying to bring back this segment, but maybe with a slight difference.  

        Back to school,  But First These Messages....



"It's the Most Wonderful time of the Year"  , Usually... actually is A Christmas song, but some mad man thought, let's use it for allergy season and be like yeah.. our drug will make sure you can huff in as much allergens as possible and have fun.  [Watch]  But before Claritin decided to do that, someone else did it. 

         This Staples ad came out in 1996, but  ran for a long time even updated to add their new slogans and stuff. I think it disappeared after a while though. The ad, not Staples. 

       


           Before I even get into the meat of the ad,  look at this shot.  [ I don't mean the kids , that was timing badness) 
I want you to look it at.  

    First it's very 90's, where replaying this ad when the kids were probably in the early 20's was weird later on, but the computer stuff dates it.  I'm also concerned about this store. They put computer monitors on shelves next to binders, notebooks, etc. Why would they do that?  This seems like a bad idea. 

        The song starts right at the start and it's trying to make you feel like "ah Christmas" isn't that nice? It' 900 degrees outside, but ah Christmas.  It's also implying that the dad , and parents think that Back to School is the most wonderful time of the year, like they actively hate their children. Even more than that, they have to spend money, so it's not that fun. This guy is having too much fun though. 
I'm not sure why he's buying whole staplers here? Was that on the list? 

        The children are sad, but not because it's back to school, it's because their dad is having a break down and they can't help him.  
They put him in a home in the future

             Staples did get a lot of juice out of this ad, they didn't have to make new Back to School ads each year.  That means they had money to pay Alice Cooper. 



                Alice Cooper's daughter, not played by Alice Cooper's real daughter, also plays the role in Staples genre of kids hate school in their ads.   I'm assuming she's playing a daughter, unless Alice Cooper randomly takes kids on Back to School shopping trips. 

        
Goths don't do school.  

  This ad also decides to make sure you see some products going on. Crayola brand stuffed, Staples had paper and ... notecards.  Pens.   Alice Cooper's real daughter would know how his song would go.. poser. 

I'm just glad Alice Cooper can go shopping and not be bothered 

      Staples paid this man just so they can make that one joke.  Back to school time is a good time to get a good cheap deals on pens and stuff, not even for going back to school, just to buy some pens. 

I prefer Ozzy anyway


Meanwhile....

No the movie you are watching isn't back on 


 Screw it, said someone at J.C Penny's I'm doing an ad based on "The Breakfast Club"!   Also, we will use a cover of "Don't You (Forget About Me)" from  New Found Glory. 

     I do like how the ad goes for retro cars, but it also feels like it's not real, they used no polish in this ad. But That's kind of a nice touch.  The school being the same name in the movie too. 


We couldn't get a Ford Bronco II , so I guess  Chevy Suburban is the same thing 


    Wait is this commercial still taking place at detention? What? I'm confused.   

What are you in for?  I brought my dog to school. 

 I forgot what J.C Penny's sales though, I guess the ad is for clothes?  By I  forgot, I think they forgot.

Buy what this kid is wearing... buy it! 


         I like how the commercial decides to have some fun and not just be a forced, though still is because ad, here's the clothes we sell, buy them. (Do buy them though) 

        
We now switch for a moment... to Joshuaonline UK 

 
        The British also have a period of time where kids take off a time from school then return... so they also get back to school ads. (Yay?) 

    
    Whilst there are schools in the United States that have uniforms for kids, it's a way more common thing in the UK.  Of course, children are children and the uniforms have to be well workable.  This ad from Matalan focuses on the product that has to be bought anyway and says "Hey ours is the best ones, because power" 

            
Very important to not let the shoes scuff 

   I hope the ad was fun to tape, letting everyone get messy like that. 
These are some odd names for Children 


            Back to America... and the 80's .... time travel 

This was an ad for Pay Less ,not the shoe store, though they do have shoes.  You can tell it's late 80's because of the rapping. 

When the classroom is too bright

     I like how it includes tube socks, like not just any socks, but tube socks.  
Need  Peanuts box 

        



 And well, this is a commercial break and they do have to end, so that's it for now.  Otherwise, we'd be in endless clothing ads and staplers.  That's does it for now, and now back to our program: 







        

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